83 jokes
Corn & farm
Why did the farmer win an award?
Ages 5+
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He was outstanding in his field.
What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
Ages 3+
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“Where's pop corn?”
Why shouldn't you tell secrets in a cornfield?
Ages 5+
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There are too many ears.
What do you call corn that joins the army?
Ages 8+
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Kernel.
What did the corn say when everyone clapped?
Ages 5+
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“Aw, shucks!”
Why do people love corny jokes?
Ages 5+
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They're a-maize-ing.
What do you call a chicken that tells jokes?
Ages 3+
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A comedi-hen.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
Ages 3+
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To get to the other slide.
What do you call a cow that won't give milk?
Ages 5+
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A milk dud.
Why did the horse keep falling over?
Ages 5+
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It just wasn't stable.
What do you get from a pampered cow?
Ages 8+
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Spoiled milk.
What did one hay bale say to the other?
Ages 3+
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“Hay there!”
How do you count a herd of cows?
Ages 3+
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With a cow-culator.
What's a scarecrow's favorite fruit?
Ages 3+
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Straw-berries.
Fruits & veggies
What do you call a sad strawberry?
Ages 3+
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A blueberry.
Why did the cucumber call a lawyer?
Ages 5+
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It was in a pickle.
What do you call two bananas?
Ages 3+
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A pair of slippers.
What vegetable do sailors hate?
Ages 8+
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Leeks.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
Ages 5+
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“Breathe!”
How do you fix a broken tomato?
Ages 3+
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With tomato paste.
Why do potatoes make good detectives?
Ages 5+
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They keep their eyes peeled.
Why did the lettuce win the race?
Ages 3+
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It was a head.
What's a cucumber's favorite instrument?
Ages 8+
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The pickle-o.
What do you call an angry carrot?
Ages 5+
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A steamed veggie.
How do you make an apple turnover?
Ages 3+
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Roll it down a hill.
What did the bean say to its old friend?
Ages 3+
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“How have you bean?”
Cheese & snacks
Want to hear a joke about pizza?
Ages 5+
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Never mind. It's way too cheesy.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Ages 5+
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Nacho cheese.
Why did the cheddar refuse to wrestle?
Ages 8+
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It was too mild.
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror?
Ages 8+
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“Halloumi!”
What does cheese say to cheer itself up?
Ages 5+
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“Gouda job!”
What's a pretzel's favorite dance?
Ages 3+
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The twist.
Why did the jelly bean go to school?
Ages 5+
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To become a smartie.
What do you call a sad cheese?
Ages 5+
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Blue cheese.
Why don't hot dogs star in movies?
Ages 8+
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The rolls aren't good enough.
Why did the gum cross the road?
Ages 3+
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It was stuck to the chicken's foot.
What kind of cheese do you use to hide a horse?
Ages 8+
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Mascarpone.
Why did the ice cream truck break down?
Ages 5+
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It hit a rocky road.
Bugs & critters
What do you call a bee that can't make up its mind?
Ages 3+
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A maybe.
What do you call a bee having a bad hair day?
Ages 5+
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A frisbee.
What's a bee's favorite haircut?
Ages 3+
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A buzz cut.
What do you call a really old ant?
Ages 5+
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An antique.
What do you call a really big ant?
Ages 3+
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A gi-ant.
Why don't ants ever get sick?
Ages 8+
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They have tiny anty-bodies.
How do fleas get around town?
Ages 5+
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They itch-hike.
What did the snail yell while riding on the turtle's back?
Ages 3+
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“Wheee!”
What's a mosquito's favorite sport?
Ages 5+
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Skin diving.
What insect runs away from everything?
Ages 5+
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A flea.
How do bees brush their hair?
Ages 3+
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With a honeycomb.
Why is the firefly the life of the party?
Ages 3+
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It knows how to light up a room.
On the road
What did the traffic light say to the car?
Ages 3+
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“Don't look, I'm changing!”
What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
Ages 5+
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It gets toad away.
What do you call a train that sneezes?
Ages 3+
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An achoo-choo train.
Where do cars go for a swim?
Ages 5+
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The car pool.
What did the boat say to the pier?
Ages 5+
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“What's up, dock?”
Why did the car need a nap?
Ages 3+
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It was wheely tired.
Why did the airplane get sent to its room?
Ages 8+
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Bad altitude.
Why did the kid put wheels on the rocking chair?
Ages 3+
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To rock and roll.
Why was the train so good at school?
Ages 5+
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It always stayed on track.
Weather
What did one raindrop say to the other?
Ages 8+
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“Two's company, three's a cloud.”
How do hurricanes see where they're going?
Ages 5+
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With their one eye.
What does a cloud do when it's itchy?
Ages 5+
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Finds the nearest sky-scraper.
What's the opposite of a cold front?
Ages 8+
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A warm back.
What kind of bow can't be tied?
Ages 5+
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A rainbow.
What happens when the fog lifts in California?
Teens
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UCLA.
How can you tell it's raining cats and dogs?
Ages 5+
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You step in a poodle.
Why did the weather reporter bring a bar of soap to work?
Ages 5+
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She was expecting showers.
Clothes & stuff
Why did the belt get arrested?
Ages 5+
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It held up a pair of pants.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Ages 3+
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Sneakers.
Why can't shoes keep a secret?
Ages 5+
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They all have tongues.
Why was the T-shirt so sleepy?
Ages 5+
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It was all worn out.
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
Ages 5+
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A stick.
What did the sock say to the foot?
Ages 8+
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“You're putting me on!”
What did the necktie say to the hat?
Ages 8+
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“You go on ahead. I'll just hang around.”
Why can't your nose be twelve inches long?
Ages 5+
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Because then it would be a foot.
Letters & numbers
These need a reader, or at least a kid who knows their letters. Best from about age 7.
Why is the letter T like an island?
Ages 8+
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It's in the middle of water.
Which letter is the coolest?
Ages 5+
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Iced T.
Which letter holds the most water?
Ages 5+
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The C.
Why is the letter E so lazy?
Ages 5+
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It's always in bed.
Why did the two fours skip lunch?
Ages 5+
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They already eight.
Why should you never argue with a 90-degree angle?
Ages 8+
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It's always right.
Why was the math book so sad?
Ages 5+
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It had too many problems.
What do you call friends who love math?
Teens
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Algebros.
Play it at a party
Toss and Tell
5–12
Ages
4–16
Players
10–15 min
How long
- Set up the bean bag board or a bucket and a throw line.
- Before each toss, the thrower reads a corny joke from a card.
- If the crowd groans, the thrower earns a bonus point on top of whatever the toss scores.
- Play three rounds. Most points wins, and every kid gets the same number of jokes.
Borrowed from bean bag toss, where the full rules live.
Corny Joke Hunt
5–10
Ages
4–15
Players
15–20 min
How long
- Before the party, write ten jokes on cards: setup on the front, punchline on the back.
- Hide the cards around the room or yard, like a scavenger hunt list.
- Kids hunt in pairs. A pair can read the front of a card, but not flip it.
- Gather everyone. Each pair reads their setups, the group guesses, and then the cards are flipped.
Borrowed from scavenger hunt, where the full rules live.
Groan Relay
6–12
Ages
8–20, two teams
Players
10–15 min
How long
- Line two teams up behind a start line, with a pile of face-down joke cards at a cone for each team.
- The first runner races to the cone, grabs a card and reads the joke out loud.
- Their team has to groan before the runner can race back and tag the next player.
- First team through every runner wins. Pair non-readers with a reading buddy.
Borrowed from relay races, where the full rules live.
When to run it
- As guests arrive: tape a few to the front door.
- At the snack table, one joke per plate.
- As the warm-up before a team game.
More games for the same party: Outdoor Party Games for Kids, Indoor Party Games for Kids and Fall Festival Games for Kids.
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Farm party
A farm party built on animals kids already know — duck-duck-goose, a potato-sack race, a farm-stand snack table, and a printable barnyard invitation.
Farm party ideas
Race car party
A race car party built around checkered flags, a cardboard pit lane and games with a real finish line — plus a printable race invitation to send out.
Race car party ideasFrequently asked questions
- What makes a joke corny?
- A corny joke is a pun so obvious or old-fashioned that it gets a groan instead of a laugh, and that groan is the fun. The word comes from old farm-town humor, which is why so many of these are about corn.
- What's the difference between corny jokes and dad jokes?
- Very little. Dad jokes are corny jokes with a delivery style: told by a grown-up, with a straight face, often as a one-liner. Any joke on this page works as a dad joke if you tell it that way.
- Are corny jokes good for little kids?
- Yes, the short ones are. Kids from about age 4 enjoy jokes built on a silly sound or a funny picture, like the farm and fruit groups here. Letter and number jokes need some reading, so they fit from about age 7.
- How do you use corny jokes at a party?
- Attach them to a game with natural pauses. Read one before every bean bag toss, hide them for a scavenger hunt, or make a relay runner read one out before tagging the next player. The groans keep everyone watching between turns.
